Learning to live life...

We CAN!

2009-01-17T09:43:00.000-08:00

I am relieved that 10 Jan is finally over! For an event that was only put together just a month ago, I guess that was all I can expect of. Everything went smoothly except for some stupid hiccups that kinda spoilt the mood of everyone... but no event is ever perfect.

The day was packed with so many activities and the greatest joy was seeing the smiling faces of the participants. There were lotsa of kids that came that day as well, and who would not be infected by their enthusiasm and energy?

Looking back, the experience was not that bad afterall. Made new friends and discovered more about myself.

Some photographs of CAN!Run, CAN!Play and CAN!Party. The Singapore 2010 Youth Olympic Games Logo was also launched.

Blinded by our own shortfalls

2009-01-08T09:27:00.000-08:00

We tend to over-glamorize the things we do and underplay the work of others. Perhaps, that is the greatest weakness of us, human beings. We are blinded by our own shortfalls, but are sharp critics of others' weaknesses.

It had been a tiring month since examinations ended. Sleeping at 4am and getting woken up by phone-calls at 9am in the morning has become a norm to me. Although school has started proper for me this week, my mind is floating elsewhere. The event that the team has been working very hard for is just a step away.

Never had I worked on a project with so much antagonism, frustration and helplessness. Beyond the load of the work, I found myself helplessly picking up the pieces of work that are left undone and unwanted. Its an experience I would say. Its an experience that have left behind many learning pointers for me about human relationships and management of my expectations. In the past, I would have exploded long time ago. But now, I am at ease with myself. Whatever comes, I accept and move on. Dwelling on the unhappy moments only pulls me back and deters me from moving forward.

We only live life once, so let's all learn to forgive and forget. No one is perfect, so just accept people's imperfections and try to work best with what you have.

The start of the new year... 2009!

2009-01-01T06:14:00.000-08:00

The Chinese kind of believe that the number "8" denotes luck, but 2008 had not been a fantastic year for the world. The Mumbai attack took away the life of an aspiring and talented spark, leaving behind a family who has to grapple with the loss of such a wonderful wife/daughter/sister.

The economic crisis that hit hard on the world caused lay offs and uncertainty amongst people. It caught many people unprepared.

A peaceful Thailand turned into a violent zone. Worse still, they are killing and harming their own people, as if violence is the best solution to solve the problem.

Personally, 2008 was also not a exactly a fantastic year for me as well. My FYP path had not been exactly smooth sailing. I remember being so loss at some point, that I just wanted to throw in the white flag. 2008 was also a year where I had to cope with many unforseen family issues admist the stress coming from my FYP. The pressure mounted and I felt very lonely.

Beyond the bad, 2008 was a year where all the tribulations have made me a lot stronger. I have learnt to cope with the stress and relationship issues that sprouted at the most unexpected times. Instead of wailing like a baby, I have learnt to hold back my weakness in front of others.

2009 is going to be a trying year as I embark on my journey of searching for a job admist the bad economic conditions. I feel the urgency to find a job because I want my parents to retire without worry.

My FYP event which is coming in a few days time will be a reflection of the work that has been done for the past half a year. I can only sit and pray of the best.

My new year resolution for 2009 is to emerge as a stronger person.

Arabian night

2008-12-15T21:01:00.000-08:00

It was the most interesting JC class outing we had thus far. Had our dinner at Zac Cafe which serves really nice fish kebab. After which, we went down Haji Lane, which was a real eye opener for a mountain tortoise like me. :P Ee Bing and I were totally stunned by the number of people who smoke shisha along the roadside. The whole street looks a little doggy which gave me the creeps at first. It's my first time seeing people smoke shisha! Interesting! Some photos from this Arabian night.

Believing in oneself

2008-12-08T08:58:00.000-08:00

The mind is a very powerful thing that governs you. I totally agree with the saying, "Mind over body." Congratulations to all my friends who managed to complete the 42km Standard Chartered Run! Pat pat!

I met up with Edmund and Sheena for a short lunch today, one day after their 42km run. For once, I can walk faster than 2 of them! hahaha.. Reminisce of those good old days where the 3 of us practically met every single day for CurL.

I am working hard to think positive of what is lying ahead of my FYP team in the months to come, trying to keep my tension at bay. I've gotten them into this and I am giving myself a lot of pressure in making sure that everything goes well. I am trying my best not to impose my frustration on the people around me and keeping them within my myself. It's going to be difficult but I will try.

Everyone, smile!

This is Fun!

2008-12-06T09:31:00.000-08:00

Hahaha.. Got this link from Ee bing's blog and tried it out. It's quite fun! http://www.faceyourmanga.it/faceyourmanga.php?lang=eng

I think my bf's one is quite alike... hahaha.. Maybe its because I spend more time looking at him more than looking at myself.

Stressed

2008-12-06T08:03:00.000-08:00

I am stressed out, totally.

Pulling off an event in one month will most probably be the most goddess thing I have done if it manages to pull through. Feeling the jitters.

At such time, I really hope for a source of support. To be exact, I am craving for support. I do not want to be independent and strong because I am not. My perfectionist instinct is settling in fast as I come to realization that this is not going to be a perfect event that I hope for it to be. Time and bureaucracy are against us.

Have I made the right choice? My heart is in a total confusion.

Post exam syndrome

2008-11-30T21:14:00.000-08:00

Work, work, work... I don't call this post exam celebration.

Friday was spent on YOG meeting. After which, a few of us went to Manhattan Fish Market to indulge in loads of seafood for dinner. Yummy! Well, we waited for half an hour for the food so I guess it cannot be that bad.

Saturday was my little cousin's birthday and spent the afternoon going out shopping for her birthday present. We bought her a cute dress from espirit and a top from Mothercare.

Sunday was spent meeting my FYP mates to discuss the truckload of publicity stuff to be done for our upcoming event. We sat at Millenia Walk's Starbucks from 10.30am to 4.30pm! Anyway, sesame street is down at Marina Square. Managed to snap some photographs of Elmo using my 3 mega pixel phone. Elmo is really adorable.

And now, I am trying to work on the proposal to be submitted by tomorrow.

I need to go shopping badly before I go berserk from the months of deprivation. List of things that I really want to buy:
1. A digital camera to replace by lousy Olympus camera
2. A laptop - perhaps later
3. A nice school bag to replace by old pink bag which I am highly surprised that it has not torn

Things I want to do:
1. Tidy up my room. It is in a complete mess!
2. Go get some exercise
3. Meet up with friends for a good lunch/dinner

It hurts

2008-11-27T07:48:00.001-08:00

Sometimes, I just want to have some time to do the things I want to do like going out with my friends and not be bogged down by tonnes of commitments. When she is takes leave, it is almost mandatory that I go out with her. My timetable is already packed to the brim but I have to force myself to squeeze out a time slot for her. If not, those sarcastic remarks will simply come out of her mouth, piercing deep. Not like I have not been committing week by week to send her to the supermarket, carrying those heavy bags of groceries, loading them onto the car while my brother can simply shirk all these responsibilities.

I am lamenting because I am really tired. Why do people like to impose their preferred time on me and I am always the one having to make time for them? No consideration on whether I am free to do so or not.

I hate living a life for others. It is going to be a tough month ahead with FYP going full force and I have only just ended exams yesterday. Yesterday, I came rushing home to attend to the tonnes of email and phone calls. Where's the post exam celebration? This semester has been very stressful and I before I can breathe, I have sunken into another commitment.

Avy is exhausted. She shall go sleep.

Night after night

2008-11-19T07:29:00.000-08:00

Night after night
The night becomes painfully silent
My mind in a complete whirl
My eyes swollen from all the tears

Night after night
The emptiness deepens
The fear heightens
The future darkens

Night after night
I hope for the strength
I hope for the joy
I hope for the courage

I hope for the day that I can find back my old self.

Simple pleasures in life

2008-11-02T08:21:00.000-08:00

Celebrated Shu Ching's 21st birthday on Friday and all I have to say is that we had lots of fun, laughing the night away. Some times, it is the simple pleasures in life that keeps you going, especially when the stress starts to mount with the impending examinations. Happy 21st bday my girl.

And yes, I definitely need to blog about this. See that odd looking orange pumpkin in the middle of the Singapore Flyer. I really wonder whose bright idea it was? But whoever it is, at least he/she has created some talking point.

My lovely board

2008-10-27T07:56:00.000-07:00

Such a pleasant surprise from my dearest 13th committee! So touched... They made me this lovely board containing all their messages to me.. :) Totally beautiful!

When everything seems rather unbearable, it is always so nice to have friends around who can perk you up with little surprises that mean so much to me. I love all of you!

The little we give...

2008-10-19T06:10:00.001-07:00

Recession has finally set in the the future seems bleak. With almost every company having hiring freezes, it further lowers any chance of finding a job your choice. I personally feel that finding a job is not difficult, but finding a job that you truly like is going to be difficult under such a circumstance. Beggars must not be choosers.

These few months have been a very challenging one for me.
August- Busy with all the WSC stuff
September- Busy groping with my FYP
October- Still groping aimlessly
November- The dreadful exams
December- Full swing into FYP
January- Event!
2 consecutive hectic years + mid way through another one = limit of exhaustion

I seriously cannot wait for all these to be over. I am already all drained and tired. My brain has kind of stopped functioning and I am dreading every day that passes by so quickly. In the past, I am busy but happy. Now, I am busy, but not happy.

As for my dearest club, I am hoping that things go well there. I know I have to let go, but it is difficult after vesting so much effort in it. My wish to the new leaders is never to forget the true objectives of the club, Espirit de Voluntaire. It is not a ground for glamour, fame and recognition. It is about volunteering, reaching out to the less privileged people of our society. And also not forgetting about the dedicated volunteers, the backbone behind the club. They deserve the recognition as much as any of you do.

Happy Birthday my dear...

2008-10-14T07:52:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday to my dear!

I guess this is the most extravagant dinner we ever had since we dated. We went to Equinox, located on the 70th floor of Swissotel. The food was really exquisite and yummy and the scenery up there was picturesque. A night that I will never forget!

So much has been going on...

2008-10-13T05:55:00.000-07:00

Recently, it takes me quite some time to recall what I did the day before. Gosh. I have been so busy with my Final Year Project and other school work. My body feels so strained and exhausted, my face looks very washed out and pale like a ghost. Every weekend passes by so quickly and before I know it, the mad rush begins again. Not to even mention that my weekends are also occupied by FYP stuff.

I went down for swimming therapy last Saturday after missing sessions for the past one semester. I totally enjoyed myself spending time with Kenny and only Kenny. hahaha... Because I really do not have many friends there already. Most of them, being in their final year, stop going altogether. I understand. Final year is a real torture. Kenny's vision has worsened once again and I can sense he there is a lot of fear mounting in him. Uncle Francis says that maybe it is time that we teach Kenny how to use the blind-man stick but I am so against the idea though I know it is for his own good. Imagine treating him like a blind when he is not blind yet. It pains me totally. What can I do for him?

Being so pre-occupied with my own personal stuff, I think I have neglected a lot of people around me. Someone, help me! I really need more time. I am totally drained just from thinking about all these.

Sleepless nights

2008-10-02T08:12:00.001-07:00

I am seriously finding it very difficult to get back into the studying mode after almost 8 months away from school. Nothing is really getting into my head no matter how much I try to force those readings in. Maybe, internship was not that bad afterall. No tutorials, projects, quizzes and FYP to worry about. Every week at school is slipping by so quickly, it is hardly imaginable! Before I know it, I have to sit for exams! I feel so ill prepared for this caged up competition in those disgusting examination halls.

Every morning, getting myself out of bed is simply torturous. No matter how many hours I force myself to sleep, it never seems enough to recharge my body battery. Not being able to have a thorough and good night sleep has become a norm to me. My eye bags are worsening... Argh.. :(

My FYP is progressing like a snail and I can only hope for the best. Burning 2 weekends in a row is totally terrible, but if it get things done, I really do not mind. It's going to be another Sunday burnt for YOG brainstorming.

Shall go to bed soon. Got to wake up early tomorrow. Praying for a good night rest.

Appreciation Dinner 2008

2008-09-23T21:37:00.000-07:00

A night of food, fun, laughter, reminisce of the things we have done for the past one year. This dinner culminates my 3 years in Welfare Services Club, a club which I really love and have invested so much effort and tears. It's an amazing club, made up of hundreds of volunteers who are willing to put in so much effort to brighten the days of our beneficiaries. It's a club never void of love. Joining WSC is perhaps my best decision since I have entered University. May the committees ahead bring the club to new heights.

Here are some photographs of the day.

Final week to mid-term break

2008-09-15T09:24:00.001-07:00

This week, being the final week before the mid-term break, doesn't make me feel any better. Next week, is going to be another week of fatigue and rush for FYP.

I agree that my recent posts have been rather depressing and yes, I should cheer up. Sourcing for happiness and relieve does seem extremely difficult recently. In the past, I can be so thrilled and happy after buying the smallest thing, like a pen. Now, even with my new handphone, Nokia 6600 Slide, which my bf has generously bought for me, only managed to make me that tiny bit happier.

I am completely lost in FYP and all my modules. I some how feel that this semester is a total mistake. Somehow, I am starting to doubt my aptitude in media. I can't seem to find that 'special media talent' in me. I can't speak well, write well, handle a simple camera... Why am I doing here? Well, I should have known since this was not even my first choice. But having said that, the pasture is always greener on the other side. Since I have managed to conquer 3 years, I will just hang in there and make the best of what I have.

Avy is aimless.. :(

Take care my friend

2008-09-13T10:46:00.000-07:00

This blog entry is dedicated to my dearest Michelle, who is now faraway in China. Take good care of yourself ya. Being there alone is not going to be easy but stay strong. Come back and teach me Chinese.. :) I really need it.

FYP panic alert

2008-09-09T10:03:00.000-07:00

This great uncertainty is seriously stifling, keeping me wide awake on many nights. FYP is kind of my final lap before I can formally graduate from university and it has such great bearings on my class honours as well. It is already week 6 of school and everything seems to be still in hibernation mode... Hardly any movement. The harder I think into it, the worse it feels. I keep asking myself; Is this the right move? I am very nervous and apprehensive and I really want to cry it all out.

To me, FYP is more than just a grade that is attached to it at the end of the day. It culminates my 4 years in the university and I really want to give it my best shot and look back with no regrets. I want my FYP to be my pride, like how CurL is to me. People who know me well will know how much pride I have in CurL, not because I feel it was a great success, but because I gave in all I could in the limited capacity of juggling both school work and the project.

Joining Pieces, Making Connections

2008-09-01T08:21:00.000-07:00

"Joining Pieces, Making Connection" - The slogan for CurL'08 mosaic mural making, put together by our beneficiaries and volunteers. This mural is now placed at HortPark.

To make things even more pleasant, Dr Vivian Balakrishnan, Minister for Community Development, Youth & Sports graced the event.

What a nice closure to my term of service in WSC. Love the mosaic, love the people who made it possible.

Stepping down

2008-08-26T09:35:00.000-07:00

My feelings are complex and I cant explain them myself.

In just couple of hours time, I will be giving my short speech on what I have done for the past year as Vice President of the club and it ends there. I have formally shed away all the responsibilities, all those heavy burdens I have weighed on my tiny shoulders for the past 2 years.

It gets painful when people say that this and that are not well done. I accept criticism but how many people really know that behind the work, is a lone ranger struggling very hard not to drown. It's really depressing and disheartening to know that all the effort that you put in is not recognized or appreciated. The work is not even for myself, it is for the benefit of the whole club. I shall just put a deaf ear to those comments. Maybe I should learn to be a more selfish person. I might be happier.

Went on a shopping therapy on Monday with mummy and it did help a little. Bought a pair of jeans and a pair of short heels. :)

CurL'08 Unveiling Ceremony this Sunday (31st August), 10am, at HortPark! Come down and view the marvelous art work by the beneficiaries and the volunteers!

I miss Korea

2008-08-24T09:43:00.001-07:00

Just 2 months ago, I was having the time of my life in Korea. Today, I am back in school, engaged in the crazy paper chase. Hia...

Finally met up with the Korean family whom I stayed with during my Korea Exchange Program. I do miss them! They were such lovely host who gave up their master bedroom for us, brought us around to many different places, taught us how to cook Korean food and so many more.... The trip would not be perfect without them.

So, it was my chance to play host since they are in Singapore. I was so excited to see them. Mr Daddy is still the joker, who tickles us with his jokes. Ms Mummy is sweet as ever and prepared for us a gift each. And of course, darling Eva, who is still so shy. Her smile makes my day.

What a lovely day!

Taking a breather

2008-08-20T09:48:00.000-07:00

In the midst of all recruitment, one particular date brought back so many wonderful memories. It is none other than 18th August. It was exactly one year ago when my team and I pulled through the biggest ever event that WSC could hardly imagined. Those fond memories are still etched very vividly in my mind.

Time really waits for no one. If we let time slip by us, it will.

With all the recruitment over, I can finally take a breather. When I look back, I am amazed that I could have pulled through yet another challenge. Honestly, after CurL, nothing is really a challenge... hahaha... But feeling alone in this battle was really miserable. It's one that I hope I will never have to go through again. Yes! I am finally stepping down. I have made many new friends and learnt many harsh realities of life.

Now, I am going to channel my attention to my FYP. Keeping my fingers crossed that everything will go well.

What a week... Recruitment!

2008-08-15T09:00:00.000-07:00

What a week it has been...! Waking up at 6.30am every morning and rushing all the way down to NTU, carry tonnes of goodie bags, move loads and loads of stuff and perspiring profusely every day for the Recruitment Fair. At least, the effort has paid off. The responses from the potential volunteers were rather good. Everything went well with hardly any hiccups. Phew. Giving my last burst of energy before I can finally step down. Recruitment Interviews on Monday and Tuesday. Last lapse.

Panic Attack!

2008-08-11T01:39:00.000-07:00

I am still wide awake at this time of the morning cause I can feel my heart throbbing profusely and my head is in a complete whirl.

But I cannot seem to pin point the exact reason why I am feeling this way. I guess it is most probably the apprehension of FYP and WSC recruitment next week.

FYP seems to be moving real slow now as we await the confirmation from the Youth Olympic Committee. The feeling of uncertainty is stifling! I really hope this is a correct move. I can't wait for everything to start moving. Though it means less rest time, at least I know we are heading somewhere. Really feeling very nervous about this whole FYP thing.

As a leader, I think I have really failed in many ways. I cannot seem to be able to motivate my members to work and I end up doing everything myself. There is so much that I wanted to achieve in the one year, but only completed less than half of them. I am not blaming anyone for this but myself for being so drained out all the time. At times, I can really feel that I am loosing all the energy in me to push things forward. Next week is going to be a mad rush. All the planning and the things to do are all in my head and I need to get them out before I go bonkers.

I really need to loosen up. Someone, please help me!

I do feel better after pouring them out. My good old blog is always there for me... :)

Happy National Day

2008-08-09T10:00:00.000-07:00

Happy National Day!

It's been quite some time since I have updated my blog. School has just started and I am already dreading it badly... The greatest horror is FYP! It's going to be a long and exhausting year ahead... hia...

Next week is going to be recruitment fair for Welfare Services Club. I have been put in so much time and effort for it and I hope everything will turn out well. Staying positive.

On a lighter note, CurL'08 ended with a nice note last week. I am so proud of my friends for putting together such a wonderful event for people with disabilities. Some photographs of the event.

The power of a hug

2008-08-01T11:00:00.000-07:00

I happened to chance upon a Channel 5 program, Trading Spouse. And one scene really touched me. A big man who never shows affection finally understood the power of a hug. He thought that by being critical on his children is best for them turned out otherwise. His children became rebellious and had a lot of dissatisfaction built up in them. All it took was a hug to heal everything. He never knew how wonderful a hug can be until he gave one to his children and finally, receiving one from his dad. Never undermine the power of a simple hug. Hugs to all my friends.

This holiday has been extremely packed and tiring for me. When I looked back, I cannot recall what I have done. No time for myself. Just busy doing things for others. I am totally drained. Totally. The rush of fatigue has settled and I really want to take a rest but I am afraid it is too late. School is starting next week and I for-see a year of rush and exhaustion with my Final Year Project in the pipeline. Recruitment starts on the 2nd week school and I am just praying everything will go well. I cannot wait for everything to be over. I want to shed away all these responsibilities and burden altogether.

CurL'08 is on 3rd August 2008! It will be held at HortPark from 9am-5pm! Anyone who is free, do come down and support! We are at Hands-On House!

Amazing. It seemed like yesterday when CurL'07 ended beautifully. Those memories are still so vivid. I miss working with my 2 buddies. We stood by each other throughout, through thick and thin. Avy misses those days!

How can life be so cruel to this little boy

2008-07-23T20:33:00.000-07:00

Attended Project IDentity 2008 on Sunday and found out that the little boy, Malcom, which was under us for quite some time is recently diagnosed with mascular dystrophy. Malcom lost his parents when he was very young and his grandma has been taking over the responsibility of taking care of him since then. Not only does he have learning disabilities, he is now diagnosed with an illness which has yet to find any cure for it with current medical sciences. It pains me to know that such an adorable boy like him will have to endure this cruel pain of losing all his muscle abilities over time. He can no longer run around like a normal child, jump with happiness like he always does.... Some time, I wonder if he does know what is happening but I hope that in this instance, he doesn't know. Ignorance is bliss. Little Malcom is currently the face of Community Chest and Welfare Services Club. Let's all pray that everything will go well for him and may his grandma remain strong.

When exhaustion sets in.. Maybe all you need is some encouragement...

2008-07-16T00:39:00.000-07:00

It's been a tiring journey for these part 2 years. I cannot recall the number of times I have broken down from exhaustion and frustration. I do feel very lonely in this battle that I am battling now and I am really struggling to hang in there. I look around, no one is there.

It does feel good after pouring out all the bottled up feelings in me. There were times that I really just wanted to drop and leave. It's the feeling of, "Who am I working so hard for? No one appreciates anyway, so why bother?"

My friends, thanks for those words of encouragements and support. I shall cast away all those negativities and work for what I think is right. At least I know I have given my best and that is the most important. That's the power of the mind. When we seem to allow negativities to settle in, you just simply feel that the whole world is dark and gloomy. And when u decide to look from things from a more positive perspective, everything seems bright and cheery. Each time, after I feel depress and snaps out of it, I feel the rejuvenation of energy in me to continue where I left off.

In fact, according to some studies, women are in fact stronger than men. My mum was sharing with me about something she learnt during her counseling class. Women are happier single while men are happier when they are married. Reason: Cause when a man gets married, he throws all his family burden to his wife. And so his poor wife got to handle everything. Women got to work, take care of her/his family, do housework... Woohoo... See! Women are resilient!

Kudos to all women on this earth! Clap clap! Avy is also a strong woman. She can conquer everything!

Complexity

2008-07-12T00:23:00.000-07:00

I think I can really be a difficult customer if I want to be. I guess I just do not like to be dictated on what I should eat... KJ and I went to this really weird cafe today to have our dinner and they had nothing left in the menu except bake rice (which I didnt really feel like eating). So since we took some pain in getting there, we decided to just give it a shot. Then, we were asked to choose our cake and so I did. And as I was halfway through my bake rice, the waitress came up to me and said that the flavour I had chosen had already been given away to the other customers and that she had forgotten to inform me when I ordered. And she tried to hard sell her strawberry flavoured cake! Well, I do not like anything that is strawberry flavoured. According to KJ, I gave her such a murderous stare that she had no choice but to go to the kitchen to find if the baker can squeeze out the cake that I want even though I had agreed to try another flavour. And true enough, she did manage to find one for me... Hahaha... Poor waitress.

There is really so much that I can do. I have pushed my body to the maximum and now I am sick. It's a horrible feeling. No matter how much effort you put, people do not appreciate. So let it be... Avy misses CurL days when I had a team working with me towards the same goal!

Off to Bangkok

2008-07-06T22:14:00.000-07:00

Finally! My first trip away with my friends. Everything of the trip was great with them around! Can't wait for another getaway like this.

Korea Cultural Exchange 2008

2008-07-03T22:24:00.001-07:00

Finally, I have some time to blog about my Korea Cultural Exchange trip! Yes.. It is long overdue but I shall still blog about it. I am so grateful for the opportunity.

One word. The trip was fantastic! I got to meet a lot of student leaders from all over South East Asia countries such as Vietnam, the Philippines, Indonesia, Malaysia and Taiwan. Though we all arrived at Korea not knowing each other, we became friends at the end of the trip. Throughout the trip, we played and had so much fun with each other that we simply forgot how those 10 tiring days passed us by. Met some lovely people whom I will never forget.

I have also taken away with me a bagful of knowledge and learning about Korea and other SEA countries. We had several cultural exchange sessions which we shared about our culture which helped to deepen my understanding of the different SEA countries. Unlike those that we read from books, learning from the participants was definitely more real and interesting.

I have to say that the Singaporean gang, 2 from NUS and 1 from SMU, were really fun people. I cannot recall how many jump shots I did in that 10 days! Oh, we are in hangbok, Korean's traditional costume in the photograph below... I look funny.

It was my first trip out on my own but I really enjoyed it. Many first experiences too. Went drinking till 2am and shopping till 4am in the morning... :P

This could possibly be my first and last exchange program before I graduate from university. I am holding on to all that I have learnt and the memories of the wonderful people I have met.

Back from Korea!

2008-06-25T13:00:00.000-07:00

I shall let the photographs speak for themselves. :) It was indeed a memorable experience.. :) Shall upload more pictures later

Off to Korea

2008-06-08T18:09:00.000-07:00

I've completed my internship! Hooray! 23 weeks have gone pass so quickly. I have to say that besides the graveyard hours, it had been great knowing so many nice people in the company. :)

I will be off to Korea tonight. Feeling a little apprehensive since its my first time travelling abroad myself. I will be back on 19th June. Praying that it will be a good trip.

Adios! Will update my blog on my exchange in Korea when I get back. Take care everyone!

Soul Searching

2008-05-28T23:34:00.000-07:00

It just struck me suddenly when I was having dinner with my bf. All my life I have been trying v hard to prove myself. I strive like there's no tomorrow in everything I do just to prove my worth and I do not deserve such treatment. I am getting jaded. I just want to do the things I like to do. I want to stop living the way people want me to live.

Working Life

2008-05-17T13:29:00.000-07:00

Working life is truly a monotonous cycle. It's been a busy 2 weeks at work, coming home at 10 plus 11 almost every night. The moment I reach home, I can feel my bed beckoning me towards it and off I go into wonderland. And my dreadful alarm clock has to snap me out of my beauty sleep every morning. Really painful! The toll of the late hours finally sapped into me on Friday where I started to send wrong emails. Beyond work, I have been rushing out my final internship report through the night. I need a break. 3 weeks more to go before I will be off to Korea! Though the long hours, I am glad that my colleagues have been really nice people. I feel more at ease with them than my previous team.

Life has not been exactly too eventful since I passed my 22nd birthday. It's been work, PI report, family commitments... One word- Monotonous

I have been faithfully reading the newspapers these couple of weeks. It pains me to read about the twin tragedy that hit Asia. Natural disasters are always merciless. They come when people least expect and throw people into a state of confusion and lost. Tears flood as people moan over the lost of their loved ones. Thousands of children become orphans overnight. I will never forget the tsunamis disaster that struck in 2004. When I learnt about tsunamis back in school, I least expected it to happen in our human life time. The world was awaken to this merciless storm that attacked the most impoverished parts of the world. Till today, the detriment of this storm continues to haunt thousands of people who are left homeless and lost.

But one positive thing always emerge in times of crisis. It is the undying human spirit. I am extremely touch by the case in Myanmar. The strong resistance by the government against foreign aid due to political reasons are putting its people in a dire state, but its people remain resilient.

Little that all of us can do for these people in China and Myanmar, let's just take a moment to pray for them.

Birthday Surprise

2008-05-07T23:20:00.000-07:00

Just when I thought my birthday mood has died down, my lovely WSC main commers decided to surprise me with a birthday cake after the meeting! Aww.. I was so touched. It's been a year with those lovelies and I have to say they've been great peers to me. I am still waiting for my friend to send my the group picture we took. Will upload it soon. Meeting my project mates tmr! Yipee!

I am 22

2008-05-05T22:59:00.000-07:00

I turn 22! Gosh! Happy birthday to me! It was a fun-filled birthday!

Met up with Nana and Ching on Labour Day to celebrate my bday. I heart the purple dress they bought for me! :)

On Saturday, met up with Xin Yi, Luana and Venetia at Paragon. Thankies for the 2 lovely handbags. I wont need to buy handbags for a long long time.

Steamboat at home was real fun! A simple meal at home is always the best.

And I spent my birthday at Terminal 3 with my bf! A nice place for a simple getaway from the busy shopping centres and streets.

A simple yet wonderful birthday I had. :)

Happy Labour Day

2008-04-30T23:47:00.000-07:00

Happy Labour Day to all in advance!

It's been a tough 3 days at work this week, skipping lunch and working long hours. I foresee tougher times in the weeks to come. On a good note, I managed to get a day's break on my birthday! Hooray!

Updates on my birthday dates:
1. 1st May- Nana and Shu Ching
2. 3rd May- Xin Yi, Luana and Venetia (My FYP mates)
3. 4th May- Dinner with my parents
4. 5th May- Boyfriend
5. 8th May- Sophie, Michelle & Sebastian (My Project darlings)

Five dates!!! :) Avy feels loved and excited!

What a week...

2008-04-27T20:13:00.000-07:00

I can't seem to really recall what I did at work the whole of last week. The only thing I can remember is that it was busy busy busy. And I broke my personal record of working till 1am on Thursday! I am tired.

I used to get really excited 2 weeks before my birthday but I can't seem to be get into the mood this time round. And so I have been trying to make myself happy by pestering my brother to buy me my bday present earlier... hahaha.. He bought me a mp3!! Hooray! It's a black Samsung K3, slim and nice. :) I am starting to feel excited for my birthday! hahahaha.. :)

My birthday bookings:
1st May: I think Sheena wants to date me on that day
4th May: Reserved for my dearest family
5th May: I assume its my boyfriend.. :P
8th May: My Project mates

Any more dates? hahahaha...

Strong Front

2008-04-15T23:02:00.000-07:00

All my life, I have always been putting on a strong front whenever I am with my family. Though people often say that family members are the only ones that one can really reveal one's true self, but I beck to differ. I am always pretending to be strong in front of them.

I guess my childhood had a part to play. The more they detested me, the more I never want them to see me crumble. All these happenings continue to haunt me till today, waking me up in the middle of the night, quivering in anger. I can never seem to wipe them off my mind. I want to learn to forgive and I have tried so hard. I know that all these happenings to me when I was a child is exactly the reason why my parents dote on me so much. And cause they love me so much, I never want them to worry about me. I want the best for my lovely daddy and mummy and it really pains me to see them hurt.

I have to be strong for them...

Be strong!

2008-04-13T22:27:00.000-07:00

I have been telling myself time and time again that I need to be strong and I will be. It has been a Sunday all to myself. Being home gave me too much time to think and so I tried to occupy myself with my upcoming FYP and club's stuff. I decided to bury myself with some work so that no one will come and talk to me. I just wasn't in the mood to talk. My initial plan had been to go do some shopping, but was not in the mood to do so and thus it was home alone.

On a good note, I will be away for most part of June.
Korea: 9-19 June
Thailand: 27-30 June

It's another week of work tomorrow. At least it keeps my mind occupied.

Lost for words

2008-04-12T22:43:00.000-07:00

Recently, each time when I want to update my blog, I seem to be lost for words. Not that I do not have anything to say, but my mind is in a complete whirl. All that is my mind now is to hope that everything at home will be fine.

Sick for a week

2008-04-07T21:17:00.000-07:00

I have been coughing for the past week... argh... The incessant cough wakes me up every night. I hope to get well soon.

Sometimes, I simply hate myself. I hate myself for being so lethargic all the time, so whiny, so fat, so emotional and so many more. But I love myself more for being myself... hahaha... So ironic... Yeah.

Good luck to those having exams! Hang in there.

A special tribute to all my loved ones

2008-03-31T00:29:00.000-07:00

My Project lovelies....

Saturday night was exceptionally lovely spending time with my project mates. 6 years and nothing has changed. The only thing that changes is the topic we discussed about and this time round, we were talking about marriage and what we will be expecting in the coming 10 years. Our first job, marriage, first child and so many changes to expect in the coming years. It is going to be daunting but exciting at the same time. To my darling, thanks for being there for me all these years, through my ups and downs. Avy loves all of you.

To my dearest Daddy and Mummy, whom will not read my blog, thanks for loving and doting me for who I am. Knowing that both of you are bearing with all the unhappiness at work really pains me. I hope to alleviate them for you but I cannot seem to be of much help. Such helplessness is making me feel very terrible.

To my special someone, though I never said anything much to you, I know you have done loads for me. You stood by me through CurL, take care of me when I am sick, lend me your shoulders for me to cry on and so many more lovely things you have done for me. You have seen the unrevealed side of me and thanks for still loving me.

2 special friends- Celestine and Nana who have been by my side since secondary school. They are the ones whom I can really pour out everything. Xin Yi and Shu Ching for all the support and love! Both of you are the greatest gifts since I came to NTU.

Though it seemed a little odd that I saying all these at this pt of time, I just wanna let my loved ones know how much I do love them. All of you have been the greatest gifts and I will treasure you with all my life. This is the first time I had so much emotions running through me at one go and I though that my blog should be the best avenue to let them flow. And yes, and not forgetting my dearest blog. It has stayed by me for the past 4 years and I am sure, for many more years to come.

The three of us!

2008-03-28T17:10:00.000-07:00

Yes Michelle... I will try to update my blog as often as I can. We are meeting tomorrow ... So happy!

It's always so sweet to have them in my life. Hugs!

Work has become rather frustrating recently since I am always at the receiving end of someone's mistakes. Everything becomes my responsibility. I have my threshold too. I do not see why I need to be covering your ass whenever you make mistakes and I get screamed at. I have never thought I was out there to prove my worth but now it seems that I need to in order not to be stepped over by you. I have not your slave, at your beck and call. For months where everyone was sneezing and coughing at the office, I remained healthy. Now, when everyone has recovered, I am down. I guess its cause I am upset at work that is weakening my body. I feel so bored at home! Argh... Just taken my medicine... I think I shall go nap again to catch up with my beauty sleep.

PW mates! See ya tmr!

My life

2008-03-23T15:33:00.000-07:00

My blog is catching dust cause I haven't been in the mood to update my blog recently.

Finally, I was back at session after such a long time. I really do miss sessions, spending time with the trainees. They are the only ones whom I can always be myself cause they do not judge and pretend. I hate politics. Day in and out, politics wag and I am tired.

Last Friday night, my cousin and I had dinner at the Japanese Restaurant at Dempsey. Though the food was not bad, I have to say the price was a little steep. Unless you wish to pamper yourself, maybe a cheaper alternative may be a better choice. Then, we went on to Dome to have a drink and chatted the night away. It's been a long time since I had such a long chit chat with my dear cousin. We have been so engaged in our own lives. A meet up once in a while is always so sweet.

Went out with Xin Yi after work on Wednesday to buy her daddy's bday present. As usual, we can bicker the whole time out... hahaha...:)

Next week, its gonna be fun. Meeting up with Nana and Shu Ching tomorrow and my PW mates on Saturday for dinner!

I heart weekends

2008-03-10T23:50:00.000-07:00

Why do weekends always come and go so quickly. I really heart weekends!

One word that comes to my mind when I think of this year's Open House is "noisy." hahaha... I just have no ears for rock music. Other than that, the day went well. Watching those newbies coming into the school makes me feel really old. :P

Back to work tmr...

Seeking comfort in what I do

2008-03-03T21:44:00.000-08:00

It is simply amazing how people can paint and mask things to make it sound like its all for my own good. I feel homeless, lost and not knowing what to expect in months to come. I can only sit and pray. At such a point, I can only choose to forgive the people for the harm they have brought upon me. It hurts and it is unjustified but I choose to forgive them and move on. Ultimately, I am the one who will suffer from the misery and unhappiness. I have to learn to love myself. If not, who else will?

My left wrist is hurting again. It is an old injury that I sustained last year when I carried some 300 boxes of mooncakes. Ouch... I think I better go get a wrist guard tomorrow... Hia... :(

On a bright note, its week 10 at work.. Counting down.. :)

Random pics

2008-03-02T12:43:00.000-08:00

My class... T09.. :)

How men see me?

2008-03-01T00:30:00.000-08:00

You Are 46% Vain

You're a little vain, but more than anything you have a healthy amount of confidence.

Thinking the world of yourself is great. Just don't think less of those who aren't as pretty as you!

How Vain Are You?

Men See You As Understated

You are an intreguing mix of girl and woman.

You're feminine, quiet, and a total mystery to most men.

Yet they often feel the urge to protect you, even if they don't know you.

You *are* a flirt, but you usually only flirt with those you know well

How Do Men See You?

Leap year

2008-02-29T23:54:00.000-08:00

Happy Leap Year to all. It comes only once every 4 years, which calls for some kind of celebration. I spent 29th Feb at work but it ended off with a good note, meeting up with my darling Nana.

And its Friday again! I am so happy.

Things happen for a reason

2008-02-26T23:52:00.000-08:00

So much hard work for the past months and bust! The feeling is kind of horrible. People can be really unappreciative of things that you do for them. I guess that's reality- that's life! I am just letting each day slip by me. Though unsure of what lies ahead, I am trying to be positive and be happy. I really need my smile back.

Finally, I got the chance to view the video taken for Marina Bay Challenge. The CD had been lying in my cupboard for the longest time and I happened to chance upon it when I was compiling some reports. It was a one hour video that summed up all the hard work for the past one year for the event. It was nice having those wonderful memories coming back gradually. Till now, I am still filled with so much pride when I talk about CurL. I really hope to walk through CurL'08 but time and energy is really not on my side. I knock off late, then rush home and begin working on WSC stuff and as the energy in me saps away, I feel my bed beckoning me towards it. Weekends are no better. Family commitments, PI report, WSC meetings are just some of the many things that I do during the weekends. And before I know it, weekends are over and I am back to the routine at office. It's been 2 months and I have 4 more to go...Counting down :(

I really wish to kick away the negativities that have been building up in me. I have been telling myself that I should stop bottling up my unhappiness and pretend that everything is fine. I just need an avenue to pour things out, a listening ear. Maybe my darling blog can be. Why do I need to keep tolerating such nonsense from people. I am already trying my very best! Behind my strong front, I do need some form of comfort and assurance. I have been crying for the past few nights and I think it is enough. I never felt that if I cry, I am weak. It is just my way of pouring things out. I am going to let go and move on. I need my smile back and I am going to find the person who has taken it away and demand it back. I believe my smile is my greatest gift and I am not allowing anyone to take it away from me.

Avy smile! Everyone smile!

How true is this of me?

2008-02-24T19:24:00.000-08:00

What Aveline Chiok Means

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic "Type A" personality.

You are very hyper. You never slow down, even when it's killing you.

You're the type of person who can be a workaholic during the day... and still have the energy to party all night.

Your energy is definitely a magnet for those around you. People are addicted to your vibe.

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.

You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.

At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.

You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.

Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.

You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.

You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily.

You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind.

A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable.

You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out.

Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia.

Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person.

You are well rounded, with a complete perspective on life.

You are solid and dependable. You are loyal, and people can count on you.

At times, you can be a bit too serious. You tend to put too much pressure on yourself.

You are a seeker of knowledge, and you have learned many things in your life.

You are also a keeper of knowledge - meaning you don't spill secrets or spread gossip.

People sometimes think you're snobby or aloof, but you're just too deep in thought to pay attention to them.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

Emotional roller coaster

2008-02-20T22:54:00.000-08:00

I do not know what is happening to me recently.

My mood swings like it has never been before and they are extremes. For a moment, I can be feeling really happy but the next moment, I am all upset and miserable. I am been breaking down into tears recently, and I am really crying for no specific reason. My tears just flow uncontrollably. I cannot seem to be able to pin point the root of why I am feeling this way recently.

One possible reason could be cause of my mum. For the past months, she has been very upset with her boss and at work. And she pours everything out to me almost every night. I understand the pain that she is going through but I cant seem to be able to help her alleviate her problem. The more I hear, the more upset I feel. She is intending to quit some time in June and that may possibly be the best solution since she is so unhappy at work.

Aside to my emotional roller coaster, every night has been rather busy. All the WSC publicity stuff has been taking up quite a bit of my time. I think as a VP, I have tried my best and I shall allow people to criticize if they want to. I cant possibly please the whole world.

Internship Part II

2008-02-18T20:28:00.000-08:00

I know its getting boring that I am going to lament about work. But I am so angry that I really need to pour out everything here.

I couldn't believe I got sarcastically told off by this irritating media owner. Who does she think she is! Irritating bitch! Yeah. I know I shouldn't be saying such stuff but I cant help it. I don't usually use such crude words but I am indeed boiling! She could not meet the deadline and still have the cheek to tell me off. I told her off by telling her that if she couldn't get back on the date that she agreed to, at least have the courtesy to inform me. That's her responsibility, not mine. I am just simply doing my job. And yeah... She said she will get back to me by today and she did not. See. What an idiot.

And knowing my temper, I won't be making her life easy for the subsequent months. Just a low ranking staff and she thinks of a world of herself. Thinking of her makes me mad. I guess it has much to do with her knowing that I am an intern. So irritating! I hate being an intern. People simply think lowly of you. But thats true to a large extent.. Lowly paid, poorly recognized. Even your pay comes late because the amount is too negligible.

Feeling irritated. I need some ice water to cool myself down.

Just 7 of us.. But we had fun

2008-02-17T22:09:00.000-08:00

It was a wonderful night with my T09 darlings! Take good care of yourself Terence! See you again when you are back!

Frustration, V day 2008

2008-02-16T01:33:00.000-08:00

It's been a tough week at work with work piling up and constantly at the receiving end of people's nonsense. I feel so helpless and frustrated when people keep pressurizing me from all ends and I am the one that gets screamed at for things that is not even my within my control. And how I wish ppl could stop pushing their problems unto me. They make it my problem, but I cant make it others cause the problem ends at me. Came home on Wednesday and cried but definitely felt much better after that. I managed to discharge a whole load of frustration that has been bottling inside me for the longest time. Oh, and I finally received my January's pay after so long! I feel quite shortchanged with that amount that I am getting but I guess I do not have a choice since I am just a lowly intern... hahaha...

Went for the 9th Hitachi Young Leaders Initiative interview yesterday and it was one nerve wrecking experience. Faced with a panelist of 5, I was constantly shot with questions, of which some really put me in the spot. The questions were rather tough and I dont think I well. Hmm, at least I was one of the 10 people who were shortlisted. Though, a large part of me is hoping that I do not get it. Shall see.

My 2nd V day was romantic and memorable. We had dinner at a restaurant called Red, White and Pure. Though we waited more than an hour for the food due to some hiccups in the kitchen, I have to say that it was worth the wait because the food was really good. Coupled with a good ambience, my V day was perfect!

My Chinese New Year

2008-02-10T04:45:00.000-08:00

These 5 days have gone by so quickly! Argh...

Well, I had all the fun this CNY. For once, I won money from black jack! Every year, I gamble during CNY, but lose money. This year, I won 4 dollars! :) Not forgetting all the good food. Some pics to sum it all up.

Internship

2008-02-06T11:47:00.000-08:00

I am back by popular demand... hahaha.. Michelle is my no. one fan!!! Hugs to my dearest Michelle.

Finally, the 5 days break is here. I have been longing for this break since I started work. My life has fallen into some kind of a monotony since work started. Waking up at 7.30, head to work, work, wait for lunch time, work and hope that 6pm will come real quickly. I guess that is the kind of life we have to go through once we graduate. Some how, I feel that I have been trusted with a considerable amount of responsibility and I do feel nervous at times. I am still grappling with media terms, costings calculation and analyzing of data.

Fortunately, I have a nice supervisor and colleague who are really nice to me. Well, but good things have to come to an end one day. After March, one is leaving and the other one will be changing team. Hia... So sad. It's been wonderful working with them. And I really dread having to work with *someone*. I think *someone* is going to think I am stupid cause *someone* thinks he/she is really smart. I really think it is unfair that he grades me cause he hasnt seen how I work! Alright, I have let out my bottled feelings and I feel better now.

Class outing last Friday night to celebrate Rachel and Yong Chun's bday was real fun! It was the biggest class gathering we've had. It's also one of the rare times that all the five guys came!! We made so much noise that it was really hard for others not to notice us...hahaha... After all these years, T09 remains united and I am grateful for them. Avy loves all of you!!

WISHING ALL OF YOU A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! MAY THE RAT YEAR BRINGS LOTSA HAPPINESS!

Sentosa outing

2008-01-27T23:37:00.000-08:00

I am a happy girl. I finally visited Sentosa after so many years! You cant imagined how thrilled I was when I took the monorail into Sentosa. It was a day out with the trainees to underwater world and pink dolphin lagoon. I cant even remember when was the last time I visited underwater world. Reminiscing those childhood days when my parents brought me there... hahaha... Oh! And I finally visited the pink dolphin lagoon too. I have been wanting to go there. I simply love dolphins and they are even more beautiful when they are in my favourite colour, PINK! hahaha... The day is made all beautiful, spending time with the trainees and volunteers. At the end of the day, I was shagged out.

Life is so unpredictable

2008-01-23T21:40:00.000-08:00

Two sad stories in just two days set me thinking. Life is really so unpredictable and fragile.

My dad was talking to me last night and told me that the aunty in his company suddenly passed out in the office and was pronounced dead upon reaching the hospital. And she was only 40 plus and leaves behind 3 children and her husband. My dad was telling me how sad and shock he felt. Early that morning, they were still talking and the next moment, she is gone.

Another sad news was received today. One of my schoolmate's dad just passed away from cancer. And her mum passed away 4 years ago. Now, leaving her behind with her 2 brothers, I can only wish that they will pull through this period.

The fragility of life makes it so important for us to treasure the people around us. Death is nothing fearful. What I often fear is that I have lots of unaccomplished things that I want to do and leaving my love ones behind. Treasure the people around you. Love them for their goodness, love them for their flaws.

PW outing

2008-01-23T21:25:00.000-08:00

Yet another project outing at a Thai restaurant at Bugis. Hee.. Had lots of fun! Don't the food just look too delicious to resist.

My day at work

2008-01-17T21:39:00.000-08:00

After 3 weeks at work, today is the latest I've stayed in office. I left at a record breaking 7.50pm! hahaha... Not that late too. And just as I wanted to head home asap, I had to be stucked in the lift! For the first time, I had to ring the alarm bell to get someone to save me and the delivery man who looked more frightened than me...hahaha... But anyway, 3 minutes later, I was saved and home I went. Interesting!

Nice photos

2008-01-17T21:21:00.000-08:00

Went out with uni peeps last Friday. We had a nice time chatting and bitching about everything under the sun... hahaha.. Can't wait for the next one!

Ah boy's 21st bday at NSRCC! The gang in yellow.

This is from Ee Bing. I think it's so nice!

What a Saturday I've had

2008-01-13T21:02:00.000-08:00

Met up with Acra before she flies back to Japan tonight at her aunt's prawn noodle stall at Henderson Road. The prawn noodle was really yummy. :) May my darling Acra take good care of herself.

Then I went down to RSP Visually Handicapped at Toa Payoh to take a look at how their session is runned. What really touches me all the time is commitment of these wonderful volunteers, whichever RSPs they belong to.

The day ended with some shopping at Marina Square and Suntec before picking up my mum up from Conrad. My shopping trip was a futile attempt so I went home empty handed... hia... But at least I had a wonderful drink at the hotel... hahaha..

Attended my ex-tutor's wedding lunch today and it was such a wonderful feeling that she has found someone who loves her so much and is finally settling down. Every woman looks the most beautiful on their wedding day. Not because of the glamorous gowns that they put on, but the innate happiness that is exuded which makes the groom and bride so beautiful. She is one tutor whom I will never forget. It all started when I was in pri 3 when I desperately needed help with my Chinese cause I was always at the brink of failing the language. And from then on, she became part of my family. She brought me out, we spent almost all Sundays together, sharing our troubles with each other and so many more. Our relationship has surpassed the regular tutor-tutee relationship. Upon meeting her today, it did jerk some tears as we hugged. And I was surprised that she still kept the photo that we took together when I was 10 if I am not wrong. Oh my gosh! Wishing her happiness in her marriage life!

One week of work

2008-01-12T11:05:00.000-08:00

Down with another week of internship. This week seemed to pass very quickly.

Met up with the university girls yesterday and it was great fun. We talked, complained about everything we have gone through for the past weeks. I shall upload the picture later.

2 days at internship

2008-01-05T00:13:00.000-08:00

Done with my second day at internship.

First day was rather boring. Nothing to do and all I did was read magazines, newspapers and almost anything I could find to occupy myself. I didn't want to bother my supervisor too much cause I know she is really busy and she was just back from her MC. So I sat at my seat obediently and read endlessly. Some of the things I read include FHM, Business Times, Poly magazines, SPH annual report... hahaha...

Second day was better since I had the internet set up. I was finally connected! In order not to waste away precious time, I decided to browse through websites on the issues relating on the campaign that I will be working on. Read quite a bit about myopia, smoking and aids.

Internship has been not bad thus far. The people there are nice and my supervisor has been really helpful in sharing with me some industry insights whenever she has some time to spare. Well, but I am still trying to get accustomed to waking up so early in the morning, getting stucked in the monotony of a job. Well, since I am there already, I shall give it my best shot. I think my perfectionist's side of me is setting in again.

2008 here I come!

2008-01-02T13:29:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year! My first blog entry for the year 2008.

Today is also the start of my 6 months long internship but I am now sitting at home at 1.30 in the afternoon... Why? Cause my supervisor is on MC and they decided to send me home and not waste my time sitting in the office and not doing anything... hahaha... What a nice company. The orientation around the company was alright.

Welcome 2008!

31st December 2007

2007-12-31T11:03:00.000-08:00

I wonder why I am up since 9am in the morning. Well, something is telling me not to waste the last day of the year.

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY TO SEBASTIAN!

What an amazing year it has been, full of ups and downs. 2007 is a year to be remembered

Challenge ur Limits 2007 came to a wonderful closure after a year of tears, sweat and pain. I can say this is perhaps the one thing that I am most proud of in my entire life. It's an indescribable feeling when I finally could bask in the glory and memory of such a meaningful event with my team of supporters, CurL'07 team, my family, my bf, NTU staff, volunteers and nonetheless, the beneficiaries. Together, we formed the mega puzzle that made the event possible. It is one thing that I will never want to forget. I want to hold on to it as long as possible.

And not forgetting my wonderful 21st birthday celebration with my friends and family. My wonderful friends who decorated the place for me and those who prepared the games to make my birthday such an unforgettable one. Thank you. I always feel so loved. :)

My project group is still united as ever. It's been 5 years but nothing has changed. Thanks for all the wonderful memories.

My wonderful T09 class that remains so united. Every meet up is such a joy.

University life can be rather lonely at times and its always so nice to have some of these friends around. Working on projects has brought us closer together and I am grateful for that. It was the worse semester thus far. Sleepless nights and endless deadlines but we conquered it! Wishing all of you good luck for the coming internship!

So many wonderful memories to be grateful for the year of 2007. It's been a fascinating year! Praying that 2008 will be a good year for all.

WSC retreat 2007

2007-12-30T22:48:00.000-08:00

WSC retreat 2007 was a fruitful one! The first bbq night was a fun one with lotsa food, laughter, chatting and fun. Thanks to Shu Ching, Shi Yin and myself, the rest of them savoured on those yummilicious chicken wings prepared with tender loving care. But all fun had to come to an end and the next day, we had a full day of meeting, brainstorming on how to bring WSC to greater heights. I would say that it was a fruitful one as the committee sat through a near 6 hrs of meeting, putting our brains together to see how the club can go another step forward. One thing for sure, the WSC website is going to go through a major revamp and I am committed to make it happen! Though I begun with great hesitation on whether I should have even taken up this post, I am proud to say that the answer is NO.

It was Sebastian's 21st bday party at NSRCC yesterday night. All dressed in yellow, our class people were again amongst the noisiest! Beyond just the regular fun with just our class members, some of our classmates had their eyes on some other people at the party. Ahem.. I wonder who? I think it's a guy called Jeremy Heng.. hahahaha... And our darling Michelle was once again disturbed and was ushered a row of guys by Sebastian. haha.. But it stopped at M3..! In conclusion, it was a night of nonsense and crapping with the yellow gang. Ah boy, please send me photo!

That's all for now. Shall update my blog once again!

My results

2007-12-28T11:17:00.000-08:00

Finally, I've gotten back my results! I stunned at what I saw for a while... hahaha.. Not because I did very well but because some of the modules that I think I will do badly turned out fine and better than expected.

My results:
1A+, 1A-, 3B+

I am satisfied. ;)

What a day to spend xmas

2007-12-27T12:37:00.000-08:00

This is perhaps the most boring Xmas day I have had thus far, spending the whole day at home.

Fortunately, Christmas Eve was better. I had steamboat with kj's soccer friends and the food was not bad. Then, we went on to meet his cousins at Holland Village. Had some drinks at Tapas bistro bar. While they drank wine, I savoured on my hot chocolate drink... hahahaha... What a loser! After the drink, we went on to Havelock Road for supper. This Christmas is sure made up of a weird combination of food which in no way suggest that it is Xmas that I was celebrating. Steamboat, Chinese porridge... It seemed more like Chinese New Year.

Beginning internship in a few days time and feeling a little apprehensive about it. Results out on the 28th! Gosh... Jitters... Let's hope for the best!

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL

2007-12-25T18:15:00.000-08:00

WISHING ALL OF YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS! HAVE A JOLLY YEAR AHEAD.

Took a drive through Orchard Road a day before Xmas eve to absorb into the Xmas atmosphere. Had a hard time trying to video it down from the car but nonetheless, here's what I managed to capture. Enjoy!

Feeling a little disheartened

2007-12-23T13:50:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was Xmas celebration at JGS with the trainees and RSPID volunteers and West End volunteers. It was a jolly occasion but I was not exactly feeling very jolly inside me. It was sad to know that my trainee was not there but the most disappointing thing is to know that he is beginning to dread session. At least, this is what I know from his mum. All she said was it's been 10 years since Kenny came to JGS but there does not seem to be any improvements.

Perhaps, it could be me. I know he hasnt been been very receptive to the new volunteers who are taking care of him and yet, I have not been going down for sessions often due to other commitments. It was some kind of a promise to my mum that I will give myself more time to rest after CurL. She just wants me to leave time for myself especially after a year of commitment to CurL. I know Kenny enjoys my company but yet, how long can I be there? I need to let go one day especially when I have been in ID for 2 and a half years already. They aren't the only volunteers who are struggling. Previously, 2 volunteers have left completely and one of them chose to change trainee because they just could not get along with Kenny. Hia...

Just hope that he is not giving up totally and still comes down for session. Or else, there is no more incentive for me to continue anymore. Maybe, I should learn to be less attached or else I am going to be really affected. Just rattling here because I do not have other avenues to do so. I shall just end year and hope for the best!

When Christmas comes

2007-12-21T22:48:00.000-08:00

When Christmas comes, what you get is lots of lovely presents, xmas lightings, crowded shopping centres, discounts and more importantly, a heart filled with joy. I love Christmas!

These few days have been very busy.

Monday- Sheena and Shu Ching came to my house to cook spaghetti before heading down for volunteers camp at downtown east. It was fun preparing the food though I think Shu Ching was the one doing most of the work. V camp was messy due to the rain but nonetheless it was fun meeting up with some of the more senior volunteers that have not been coming down for quite some time.

Tuesday- Went down to school for Kids' World. A mass of over 70 children coming altogether can be quite a din... hahaha.. But they are really adorable and cheeky. Had some fun running around the school with the Media and Information team to cover all the activities. I came home feeling really tired...

Wednesday- Met up with Xin Yi at Marina Square to exchange presents. I received a winnie the pooh and forever friends mouse pad... hee... I guess people cant go wrong by buying me Pooh. She is my crapping friend and we always seem to have enough topics to talk about and to suan each other.

Thursday- Went Junction 8 with kj and bought nail stickers for my precious nails. I am all geared up to looking good for xmas. :)

Friday- Mummy took off today and I went down Orchard with her. Orchard is crazy! The place was thronged with so many people. Gosh! It's a no-no place to go days before xmas. Went down to support RSP Hearing Impaired Song signing at Wisma today and as per normal, it was a great performance by the new volunteers. Each year, they travel around various shopping centres and perform song signing for the public, to raise awareness of the hearing impaired in Singapore and to also spread the joy of the xmas season. I am always proud of my wonderful club!

Tomorrow is Christmas celebration at JGS! Looking forward to it! Merry Christmas to all! 4 days to Xmas... Counting down.

A day with the elderly

2007-12-15T23:43:00.000-08:00

Today was a real busy day...

It started in the morning where I went to visit kj's aunt and uncle. The noodle the aunt cooked was nice which is why I actually did finish the whole plate.

Then, I went down to visit RSP Elders at Ang Mo Kio. It was an eye opener taking a visit there though I was really quite apprehensive on how to break a conversation with the elderly. Met this 79 year old lady who speaks very good English and we rattled on for about an hour. It was lovely talking to her, talking about what she used to work as, the difference between the old and the young and many more. And the sweetest thing she said to me is, "Girl, from the way you talk, I can tell you are a clever girl." Wow, that really made my day! She also said I am pretty and that I am not too fat and not too thin... hahaha... I wonder if she is just being nice but I shall choose to believe she meant it.. hahah... Too much compliments for the day... Blush blush... And at the end of the day, she said to me, "Hope to see you next week." I guess this should be the greatest joy that a volunteer gets at the end of the day, when you know you are appreciated.

This is somehow the same sentiment of why I managed to stay on in RSPID for such a long period of time. Despite the hours spent and the exhaustion, I still hope to be there, to be part of the trainees' life. Though I may be going down less due to other commitments, my heart still lies with the trainees whom I have been with for the last 2 and a half years. Sometimes, I do feel like giving up when people say those hurting stuff. Not that I do care about what people think of me, but it hurts to know that your genuine intentions are misunderstood. I join not for anything, not for position, not for points. If that had been my intention, then perhaps, I would not be where I am today and I could have walked away and just concentrate on my core role now. Well, I guess I cannot satisfy the whole world...

On a good note.. I've got a new pendant! :)

What I have been doing?

2007-12-13T19:03:00.000-08:00

I have been busy busy busy! I mean busy shopping and meeting up with friends and all.

Saturday- Met up with the T09 gang! It was great fun having steamboat and Michelle's place, chatting, joking and playing stupid games that got everyone all high. 5 years have gone by but nothing has changed cause t09 is still the best class ever. Though we may not meet as often as in the past, but we know that in each of our hearts, there is always a place for each other and the memories we had in t09.

Monday- Went down to school to help do some car-washing to raise funds for our project. Though the rain came, we were glad we managed to raise some money!

Tuesday- Met up with darling Celestine. I have known her for 9 years! Gosh! We had lunch at Shin Kushiya and after which, we did some shopping. I bought myself a beautiful dress (or at least I think it is beautiful) and was crazy enough to wear it out that night when I just went to return my uncle his camera.. hahaha... It's always nice to meet up with my dear Celestine, whom I can really open up my heart to talk about anything in my life.

Wednesday- Sheena and I met Wendy and Celine over lunch and had some good time talking and enjoying Thai food. The tom yam almost killed me. I was all red and perspiring after finishing just a bowl of it. Both of them have been extremely supportive towards me and my team for CurL and am glad to have known them through this journey. Then, we met up with Shu Ching to have yet another round of shopping at Bugis. I bought myself a top and a pair of shoes. Then, we went to buy the xmas exchange gift for ID. I thought my gift is really cute cause its not boring chocolates that people always get for xmas exchange. For dinner, it was Thai food again! But the food was really good and worth the money! And we are sure going to become fat by pigging on desserts after a hearty meal! hahaha...

Thursday- Met up with my project mates and like always, it was enjoyable. We had lunch at Waraku since Sophie and Michelle have never tried it before. Our sweet Sophie also bought us donut from donut factory.. Yumz...

I love this fun packed holidays!

Luana's bday

2007-12-06T17:17:00.000-08:00

A night with our birthday girl... Happy 21st bday Luana!

Game

2007-12-02T23:07:00.000-08:00

I have been entertaining myself with this online game since exams ended. One caution, once you start, you cannot stop because the game does not have a pause option. I broke level 50 but my hands were too tired to continue on. Try it!

http://www.onemorelevel.com/games.php?game=171

irresponsible

2007-12-01T01:13:00.000-08:00

How can someone be so irresponsible? I wonder. Some people should really learn how to think for others too and stop being so selfish. Angry Avy! But I am not going to let this spoil my mood. It's not worth it at all.

Met up with the new CurL committee today to know what have they been up to. Reminiscing those good old days when I had to go for endless meetings. It was a tiring period but it was also the most memorable times of my life in my university days thus far. Remembering those heated calls that were made in school with PUB and NCSS. And who will ever forget the 3rd party liability insurance for PUB?

These are now memories that will be etched deeply in my mind. If I could live again, I will still choose to go through this journey despite knowing that it can be so daunting. It's the sense of satisfaction that one gains at the end of the whole journey, savouring the good times and the bad times. At least I know, my team and I brought CurL'07 to another height and the beneficiaries and volunteers enjoyed themselves. It may not be the best event, but we did our best in our abilities.

Now, I can only lend my support to them as much as possible. Wishing that CurL'08 will be a success! Visit their website at http://clubs.ntu.edu.sg/ntuwsc/sp/curl/
Anyone who wants to volunteer, tell me!

What to do when I am free?

2007-11-28T13:17:00.000-08:00

Went out with Sheena last night and had a good time chatting and eating at Coffee Club. This is honestly a fattening business... All we do when we meet is sit and eat! hahaha... Then decided that we walked down to doby ghaut before going home so that we can lose some calories that we put on.

* Praying for the families of the 5 dragon boaters.

Condolences

2007-11-26T23:20:00.000-08:00

I am finally free from mugging, at least for the next half year or so since I will be out doing my internship.

I have been relatively sad over the accident that took place in Cambodia where 5 dragon boaters were drowned to death. Five, bright young men, and it had to end up this way. My affiliation with the sport could have had some bearings on why I feel exceptionally sad over the issue but also knowing that the NTU dragon boat team members are all so sad over the lost of their friends pains me too. They have been a bunch of helpful friends and they would never imagined that the safe sport that they have been constantly assuring me turned out to be tragic for some of their friends. My deepest condolence to their families and friends. May they stay strong as they pull through this sad period of their lives. It is not how long one lives, but how well one has lived. The fragility of life reminds us that we must treasure all the people around us. Show them that you love them!

Too tired to move

2007-11-23T12:38:00.000-08:00

Decided to change my blogskin cause I felt that the words spacing in my previous layout was a little tight and tedious to read.

The 4 consecutive papers that I had this week is finally taking a toll on my poor body. I slept so soundly until 11.30am today and I cant seem to get my body to start mugging for my last paper. An incident yesterday struck me. I almost got into an accident with a BIG truck cause he cut into my lane without signaling. Suddenly, I sensed this humongous shadow on the left side. Luckily, I was calm enough... hahaha... Just praising myself after all.

Yesterday's misunderstanding during the examinations seem to have stirred some real unhappiness amongst some CS people. Well, it is just a funny incident and its over. Actually my lecturer is quite pitiful. He is just a visiting lecturer who is not sure about the school's examination system. And he got reprimanded by the chief invigilator in front of all of us. How can he be so rude! He ordered him to count the papers... Come on, he is still a lecturer after all. Give him some respect can! I have no ill feelings against this lecturer although half the time I do not understand what he wants and he did not give my group a very good grade for our project. But he is really a passionate lecturer! That one I have to admit.

That's all. I shall go watch TV before beginning my revision for my last paper.

Papers after papers

2007-11-22T20:57:00.000-08:00

I survived 4 consecutive papers! Woohoo! And I am drained. 1 more paper to go.

Most of the papers went rather okay for this week. At least, I had stuff to smoke through the papers. The power of smoking!

Something interesting happened for my paper today. Our darling prof misunderstood an extension of time for one student as for all. This means that I could not finish the paper when he suddenly insisted that all of us hand up the paper immediately after he found out that it was a misunderstanding. Feeling quite unfair about this but there is nothing I can do.

I cant wait for the last paper on Monday to be over so that I be totally free! Examinations are simply draining, both physically and mentally. Good luck and hand in there for those that are having examinations! Jiayou!

Is this really me... ?

2007-11-18T18:49:00.000-08:00

Lets101 - Free Online

Try it! hahaha.... I think it is quite true.

Who cares about digital

2007-11-17T01:37:00.000-08:00

Mummy is back from Hong Kong. She bought me a pretty jacket, a handbag and a hand-phone chain. :)

I seriously hate reading 301 notes cause all the technical terms are simply jargons meant for the digitally savvy. So I gave up half way through. Basically, the whole book just keeps harping on the wonders of digitalization and it seems like all forms of the media will be gobbled into it. Huh! Not that I care less about it but I kind of feel that it is too sweeping a statement to pass about the media industry. I do agree that the digitalization opens up the floodgate for more exploration, but it does not means that traditional media like the newspapers and TV are simply going to vanish or dwindle in importance. Well, I am still a fervor fan of watching programs and video from my TV set, hard-copy versions of the newspapers and magazines. It simply feels more real.

Well, no matter how much I hate reading it, I cant escape! I still need to finish conquering those notes. Slapped back to reality.

I shall go sleep. Havent been sleeping well. I guess I will need to move on. No use harping on what is over since I cant do anything about it anymore. Looking forward is the best strategy.

A bad beginning

2007-11-14T21:43:00.000-08:00

I had my first paper today and there is only one word that I can use to describe it, 'BAD!' Who said that open book examinations are easy? I lost 20 marks purely cause I could not find the answer anywhere in the textbook and according to some, he casually mentioned it during the lecture and not in the slides. Argh! I am hoping the rest that the rest of the papers will do just fine. This semester is all a mistake.

After the paper, went for dinner with Sheena to Great World City. We wanted to eat at the foodcourt but to find out that prices have soared by so much. The cheapest there is $3.80 and the average is like $6! Ouch! I am starting to understand what it means when people lament about the increasing cost of living.

How am I going to survive through next week? I wonder...How to finish studying! Gosh! Jiayou to all having exams!

Keeping my fingers crossed

2007-11-13T10:34:00.000-08:00

I have made my choice and now I can only hope for the best.

Heading no where with my revision

2007-11-12T20:21:00.000-08:00

This semester has been horrible, totally aimless and full of rush. My revision is also heading no where as I plough through tonnes of notes but nothing goes into my head. Gosh. I wonder how am I going to conquer exams this time round. I am tired even before it starts. Desperately needing a source of energy to keep my spirits going. The thought for having 4 consecutive papers next week is enough to make me feel tired. :(

I have to make a decision soon since I got accepted by both companies. The deadline is tmr. Which should I chose? Sometimes having too many choices can be draining. I shall give it a good thought tonight before I make my decision. 6 months is not exactly a very short time.

Perhaps, I should get some inspiration from the textbook on how to be motivated to study.

Counting down to the end of exams and the start of lots of fun! Should stop thinking about playing until I finish conquering all 6 papers! But I cannot seem to control my mind. :P

November Babies

2007-11-10T21:45:00.000-08:00

Here's a consolidated list of birthday wishes to all the Novemember babies!

1st November
Happy Birthday Terence! Hope to hear from you soon. Australia suddenly seems so far cause we havent been hearing from you... :

2nd November
Happy Birthday Qian Hui! Stay cheerful and happy! Good Luck for the coming exams!

10th November
Happy Birthday Lidia! All the best to your FYP. Stay strong and perservere! Dont be too stress ya. Stay pretty... :)

Happy Birthday Kim Huat! Thanks for walking me through the one year in CurL. You've been a great friend to me and I hope I am to you too..

Buzz...

2007-11-09T19:02:00.000-08:00

Exams are coming and it has come to my realization that I have so much backlogged readings to do but yet I am procrastinating. Papers start next week but why do I feel that my body and mind are not ready to work.

Went to catch the bee movie with kj yesterday night to de-stress. The verdict for the show: Hilarious, light-hearted. But if you are not a fan of yellow and black, perhaps you have to give this show a miss. It is worse when you buy pop corns too.. hahaha... :P My opinion is that it is definitely worth the watch if you wish to take a breather from the human world. The show has lots of bees and other creatures likes mosquitoes and flies and all. There is a part that I must mention. Winnie the Pooh appeared in the movie... hahaha... Curious to know, go watch. So take a break, and go catch the bee movie.

Need to get down to more readings. Hia.. Dreading exams!

CS 334

2007-11-07T14:47:00.000-08:00

Here's my CS334 team mates! We went through thick and thin with the Wei guy... hahahaha... :) Sad news: We did not do very well but I guess we did our best and so be it. Grades is not everything. Ouch... But still feeling the pain from the bad score I see.. :(

Here's how I look in office wear. Gosh. Look so old! I don't want to grow up!

It's finally over

2007-11-07T00:14:00.000-08:00

Today was the much dreaded presentation for the campaign plan. I am so glad it is over for good. This project has been really haunting and exhausting, and the six sense that it is not going to turn out well is rather unsettling.

This semester has gone by so quickly and exams are starting next week! Gosh! It has been a semester full of rush, starring at the computer for countless number of hours, rushing to choose an internship company, going for internship interviews, WSC commitments.... Its amazing how 14 weeks of my life has gone by so swiftly without myself realizing what I have been doing thus far. In conclusion, it has been an aimless semester.

I completed another chapter for my management module today and I am rather proud of my progress thus far. Feeling so hardworking for my GE! Well, but for all my Core subjects, I do not seem to find the urgency to start on them.... :P Reason being that I do not even know where to start from. Conclusion: Aimless semester.

Silently hoping that internship will be much better though 6 months feels rather long. There's a lot of anxiety, fear and uncertainty mounting in me especially when I am still waiting for the other company to get back to me. Hope I wont be torn between two cause I really won't know which one to choose. Mummy is not around to help me! Avy is lost! 6 months is quite a long time so I really hope to make the right decision. Well, but what is right? I guess I will never know.

Feeling fat. I think I need to lose some weight! Argh... Have been feeling extremely tense recently, perhaps due to the mountain of project deadlines and exams that are coming. I think I really need to take a break. Go to a park or the beach, somewhere away from projects, school work and exams!

Deep in emotions

2007-10-30T23:32:00.000-07:00

My head feels stuffy. These few days had been extremely tiring with all the reports deadline and assignments to churn out. Although it keeps me working and I do not mind that, I kind of feel that I am missing out a lot of time spent on myself and my loved ones around me.

Visited my maternal grandmother a few days back and she seem to have aged quite a bit. Though I know ageing is a natural process, I can't help but feel sad and hope that I could spend more time with her. I love my grandma... When I was young, I used to spend my entire school holidays at her house cause I hated being at home. She filled the empty me, always showering me with my favourite food and lots of care cause she knows I was not loved at home. Not that my parents did not love me, but my paternal grandparents just couldn't be nice to me cause I am a girl. I remember accompanying my grandma to the market near her old house at Ang Mo Kio. I would be like a spoilt bred having my breakfast while my grandma went and bought all the food that I wanted to eat. This accounts for my hefty size when I was young... hahaha.. But I am still fat now... :P I love you grandma!!!!

Sunday, a weird combination of people went out together. My father, my brother, my bf and myself... hahaha... At least I think its weird. The reason: My brother wants to buy a punching bag and my dad feels awkward going out alone with my brother. Weird but true. My dad and my brother cannot go out together. So in the first time of my life, I have 3 men with me when I bought shoes. :P

I got my internship at Mindshare. :) Shall be going for another interview on Friday and see if I get selected. Need to take a good rest.

Happy Birthday Shu Ching

2007-10-28T18:24:00.000-07:00

Happy 20th Birthday to Shu Ching, my darling successor for CurL. Stay brave and healthy!

Relieve

2007-10-28T18:14:00.000-07:00

After days working on that irritating project, at least the major part of it is over. Even had to forgo a project outing cause of it. Now, will just have to work on the presentation which I am silently praying that all will be fine.

Mummy left for Hong Kong this morning for work. She will be there for 3 weeks. Oh manz... Avy is mummy-less for 21 days! No shopping partner for 3 weeks... hahaha... But anyway, exams are coming and I have yet to start on my revision because of all the projects. Argh!

An update on my attachment interview on Friday. I guess it went quite well cause the interviewer was really nice and offered me a good insight of what the company does. The environment seems quite a nice place to learn. Going for another interview this Friday and hoping it will go well.

Feeling hungry. Didn't take my lunch... :( Waiting earnestly for my dinner...

I hate CS 334!

2007-10-27T22:55:00.000-07:00

I stayed up till this morning 5 am to finish compiling and synthesizing the tonnes of information into 20 pages! And spent the whole afternoon today still synthesizing and getting information from all sources. I totally hate this module that I am doing! Sucking away all my energy. The worse part is that I do not even know if my hard work is going to pay off cause I have no idea whether what I am doing is the right thing for that Wei guy! No direction and just doing blindly.

I am so tired... :( Praying that my rashes do not come out again.... Hia... Anyway, here are some failed attempts at drawing some pigs for my project. Have a good laugh, especially those who need to destress... :) hahaha

The Crunch Time

2007-10-24T01:16:00.000-07:00

I have not been faithfully updating my blog because school projects are pouring in like torrents and have just recovered from my cough and fever... hia..So much work to do yet so little time. Exams are coming as well... And still no news of my professional internship...

Something happened at home recently. My grandma is losing her sense... Literally... She keeps saying that people are looking at her and that we are locking her out of the house. Like since when? This has caused some drama at home in which the whole family has been activated... hahaha...

Feeling really tired of projects. Feeling very sick at staring at the computer for many hours, withstanding the back breaking position that I sit, reading over the same report umpteen times, racking my mind hard on how to improve on the project and endless project meetings. I feel that I am heading no where with these projects that are really poor simulations of the real world projects that I will be undertaking. I am dreading it, heading aimlessly but yet pouring in so many hours of hard work... If only I could take a clean break from this academic rat race and expectations of others, to live my own life. But what do I really want? Still pondering but will find it soon.

For now, I shall go and sleep to store energy for tomorrow. Goodie night to all! :)